Sport, or not


A friend, let us call him Mushy, defines a sport as any activity that cannot be accomplished while smoking or wearing slacks. As a definition, this leaves something to be desired since clearly Synchronised Swimming is not a sport despite being a bit difficult to do while smoking or wearing slacks. Even in the office.

The obvious Third Law of What Constitutes A Sport is that it has a clear result without resorting to subjective judgement. This neatly excludes Synchronised Swimming, Ice Skating, Ballroom Dancing and Ski Jumping so we are onto a winner.

Until now.

News has just reached me of a sport that cannot be practised while smoking and the wearing of slacks is prohibited by its Laws. Moreover, it has a clear winner: everybody.

I cannot decide whether this means Western society has now reached the acme of its achievements, or whether perhaps this is a clear sign that we are in a decadent spiral of decline. Here come the Goths!

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6 Responses to “Sport, or not”


  1. 1 hame_ward September 21, 2010 at 04:08

    Whilst I love the definition provided by the loveable Mushy, I cant help but think about the legend that is John Daly.. He seems to compete quite succesfully while smoking, wearing slacks, even with a bottle of whisky if the guys at the top were to allow him. Iv forever stood by the ruling, if its hard (mentally or physically), its a sport :) This therfore sneaking in my love for the game of poker, a hotly discussed pastime amongst the sporting ranks. Check out my blog which has just begun today, and to future posts likewise.

  2. 2 mushyp November 5, 2008 at 22:16

    In that case, I think it’s pretty fair to say that we’ve both come out of this on top.

  3. 3 Dominic Sayers November 5, 2008 at 08:12

    I might as well come clean and say that my sole reason for posting this in the first place was so I could tag it with “sports governance” and “lingerie”. And I didn’t even mention Max Mosley.

  4. 4 mushyp November 4, 2008 at 21:03

    It was terribly clever, wasn’t it? I think that now’s as good a time as any to declare that those eight years of tertiary education were officially Not Wasted.

  5. 5 Dominic Sayers November 4, 2008 at 09:23

    I see what you did there

  6. 6 mushyp October 31, 2008 at 21:51

    I think you’ll find that all protagonists in the LFL are smokin’.

    Mushy’s Laws remain the ultimate arbiters of What’sASportOrNot


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